It's safe to say that Instagram is one of the main social media platforms that entices the culture of comparison with the numerous influencers online. Being in this community and seeing so many women with a glamoured lifestyle, or beauty or mindset can easily put someone in a comparative mode and make you question about the things you are lacking.
It's so important to catch yourself when you notice you are having these thoughts and understand that what you see on Instagram is not the whole reality. This even goes for the Alopecia Community online too. I have witnessed so many people with Alopecia express that they just want to be confident to go out without any wig or scarf like many influencers online show that they do. However, there are so many things to stay mindful of when having these thoughts, such as:
We are all at a different pace. Comparative behavior will only initiate negative self-talk. Just because someone else has reached the point in their journey that they are now comfortable to go out without anything on, doesn't mean they didn't have to fight through their journey the way you currently are. Everyone starts at different paces and our journey's are unique to our individual self. This shouldn't be compared.
Just because someone shows their bald head on Instagram and seems confident, it doesn't mean that they don't have their down days too. There are so many women who share beauty and wig tips and it may seem like they have it all together, but you don't know how they may be feeling behind the scenes on some days. Alopecia acceptance is a hard and long journey that many of us are on, but it's important to remember that the people you are following are human and suffering too, no ones life is perfect!
Some things are sent to influencers for free. There is a pressure for multiple people to feel like they need to be able to have the most expensive and beautiful looking wig or beauty products just like everyone else, but reality is some wigs and products are sent from brands. It is easy to think that everyone is in a position to afford these luxury wigs or other luxurious items, but a large majority can relate to not being able to do so. Some get them sent to them, some save up for them for ages, some have help from others and so much more. Don't compare to a reality you are unaware of!
Asses your negative comparisons - try to understand the root of them and what area's are feeling inadequate in your own life. If there are things you want to change, work on doing so individually rather than comparing to others. Be patient with yourself and understand that progress cannot be forced or hurried. There is a reason why our journeys take different times and are so unique. If they were all the same, we would not have any authenticity within ourselves; try to:
Give yourself more credit for coming this far.
Thank yourself for the little achievements.
Practice positive self-talk.
Practice self -care.
Get rid of the pages that you feel are inauthentic with their reality. Follow pages that are real and that you feel will motivate you and inspire you.
The pattern of comparison starts and ends with you. As soon as you realize that your time on social media is resulting in negativity and comparison, assess the pages you follow and the time you spend online. Give yourself breaks from time to time and remember that people show you what they want you to see. There is always a bigger picture, a bigger story, a bigger pain that you are unaware of. Be mindful and protect your space!